It’s amazes me what passes for “breaking news” these days.
It wasn’t that long ago that when the networks broke in on regularly scheduled programming, the news carried national importance. Now it seems anytime there’s a car chase, it’s breaking news on the national cable news stations. One can almost envison the following “breaking news” scenario:
A breaking news screen comes across the TV followed by aerial footage of a multilane highway with smooth flowing traffic except for one pulled over automobile.
Newscaster voice over: “You are presently viewing the live video footage of a disabled vehicle on the interstate Route 90 from our local affliate’s Skycopter. At this point in time, we have no clear indication of why the vehicle is pulled off into the emergency lane, though some passing motorists have told our affiliate that the rear driver side tire appears to be flat.”
Sky camera zooms in on the vehicle and shows the flat tire. Suddenly an individual exits from driver’s side and walks to the back of the vehicle.
Newscaster: “It appears as someone, perhaps the driver – we don’t know for sure, has left the vehicle and is now walking to the back of the car.
Sky camera shows the trunk door opening up and the individual reaching into it. The person pulls out some tools and goes over to the flat tire, bends over and appears to be setting up some small equipment.
Newscaster: “At this point in time, it is still unclear if there are other occupants in the vehicle.”
More live video footage showing the person apparently struggling to properly set up equipment to jack up the vehicle.
Newscaster: “We have, Bill Jones, one of our affliates on the line. Bill, can you provide some insight?”
A small square photograph of Bill Jones shows up in the upper right hand corner of the screen.
Bill: “What I can tell you is the following: We do not believe that Triple A has been notified. Our sources there confirm that they have no record of a call for assistance from any vehicle in this vicinity.”
Newscaster: “Very interesting.”
Bill: “We can also confirm that at least one tire is flat and…”
Newscaster (breaking in): “Bill, I’m sorry but we are now seeing the departure of another person, apparently a male, from the vehicle. This person appears to be walking towards the brush growing on the side of the highway. He is entering into the brush area….”
Video shows partially obscure and shaded man in the bushes.
Newscaster: “At this point, we are not sure if this second individual is related to the first. Bill, does it look like he is trying to flee the vehicle?”
Bill: “I believe he’s urinating. Though it is hard to tell through the foliage.”
Camera zooms in on second occupant, but no detail can be seen.